I am pregnant, So what?
The first time I wrote this article, it was the saddest article I have ever written for such a happy thing to celebrate. You see I was looking at it from a crooked angle, I felt that the joy of being pregnant is somewhat intensified by the wait, the struggle and the sleepless nights that my friends have gone through or are going through as they wait/waited for a baby. I was not in that list and so the joy of being a parent felt unjustified, you know like the way at church a murderer’s testimony of how God saved him is seen as bigger than the obedient kid who’s greatest sin was stealing sugar, I felt like mine was too easy to be called a miracle. I am one of those whom contraceptives were created for, because if my husband so much as looks at me I am most certainly getting pregnant. The article was titled, I am pregnant So what, a title I have decided to keep but change the angle of my story.
I remember a friend posting online about her pregnancy and I was so elated, I knew her story albeit from Facebook, I knew she had been waiting to get pregnant for a loooong time and when she made her announcement I was elated, because occasionally I would say a prayer for her. She deserved the joy. For her it was I am pregnant and the world in unison responded SO LET’S PARTY. I remember she said 3 things that she learnt during her 5 years of waiting to conceive.
1: No amount of crying and throwing a tantrum can arm-twist God. When He says wait; you do exactly that. Its haaard and your character is tested in more ways than you could imagine, but learning to trust His word when all else looks bleak is all He needs in forming your character.
2: Be gracious to people. They mean well; but they will say the most hurtful things. Most coz of not knowing what to say will keep hurting you with their words of wisdom. My favorite ones were those after asking if I didn’t have kids by choice or because i wanted to loose weight first, would end up in the God’s timing pit, plus enjoy the season, or you should stop stressing you know stress is a cause of infertility blah blah blah.I got so used to these statements, I learnt to laugh them off.
3: I have learned to mind my own business. Having seen how careless words hurt; I have made it my business not to give my opinion about any matter unless asked. Its not my job to ask why my friend is still not married; or why another one is still dating a guy I don’t approve of; or why someone is still eating pizza while complaining of their weight. It’s none of my business.
Pregnancy no matter how long you have waited or not waited, whether it happened as an opps, you were on contraceptives and somehow conceived is a joyful, happy experience. It is a MIRACLE. It is a privilege that not every woman gets to experience so embrace it, take a day at a time, go through the motions, ride the waves.
Sharing my pregnancy news made me freak out a little bit, you see my story was not like Daisy’s of waiting for years, giving up and waiting again, when I thought about all my friends who have been waiting for a baby, I knew they would be happy with me, but I have been wanting this for them as well. I will not cease to pray for them, I know God in his own time and space will come through for them and maybe no in the way we expect Him to but He will.
So there you have it, this woman is pregnant, SO LET’S PARTY… and not looking forward to the face breaking out, the swollen feet, the crazy back aches, the insomnia, the labour, Oh!! The Labour. This being the second pregnancy, I am wiser, stronger (except the occasional meltdowns that Tony gets to experience every so often- he even says it’s once a week, I need to change the pattern). I am looking forward to the kicks, the turning, and yes I plan on ‘ruwalking’ the Beyond Zero marathon with my 8 months pregnancy so I have started practising early. First Lady I see you in 2016 =)
If you are on this journey with me, be sure to sign up for Project Baby Shower we have 1 month to go it will be amazingly informative and you will have awesome mamas to walk with your through labour and life after. It was great having women I could run my frustrations, fears and joys when i was a new mum and how much more great would it be if those mamas are professionals… We have a few more spaces left as ew can only take 20 mums, we need to maintain the intimacy and make sure that mums get o have all their questions and worries answered…
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