Another Chance, Every Morning for Mums
I have a new rule at home, no TV before 6pm, now that sounds like a nice rule for him to recite which he does pretty well, but to understand 6 pm for him is another thing all together. He never cared for TV before, he preferred his toys, playing outside or on my phone, well, my phone I could say no. Enter Netflix and he discovered new cartoons, Max and Ruby, Peppa Pig, Ben and Holly, Daniel the Tiger and he somehow became glued to the TV, so I have had to come up with TV rules, you only watch TV after dinner and that is after you have played with your friends outside.
We always hear terrible twos and we prepare ourselves for when they turn 2 years, well, you ain’t seen nothing yet till you get to 3 years. Three, is 2 multiplied to the power of N. This boy is a pure mix of adorable and head strong, really no one thought to prepare mothers for 3 years, I always read about 24 months, no one said 3 years would come with hair pulling and sitting down staring at this barely 1 meter tall, head strong little human determined to get his way at whatever cost and the next minute he says the sweetest words any mother would want to hear, and you know he means them.
“Mugi, don’t get out of your seat belt, we are driving and you need to be strapped in.” Screams saying how he wants to see the road, I assure him he will see the road when we get off the car and he sits back and announces, “Mama, I want to be a bird when I grow up.”
“So that I can fly away in the clouds.
You will fly away with who?
“With Tata, up up in the clouds like a space shuttle”
You will fly and leave mama?
“Of course (no kidding he said Of Course), I will fly with you mama.”
Well here I am with my 3 year old toddler findings, because no one will tell you to prepare for it, I will be that mum who for warns you. If you thought 2 years is a test of patience, 3 will make you realise that 2 was nothing
I look forward to 8 pm, that glorious, golden hour, I really do, but 8:15 is the proof that yes, it is all done. I find myself always speaking at higher decibels as the hours wear off until 8:00 pm when he sleeps but sometimes he will continue talking in bed until 8:15/8:30, but I can ignore those ones.
Mugi get down from there
Mugi you will break the TV stop that
Mugi stop spraying the TV with water, I will take away that water gun
I said no riding the scooter in the kitchen
Stop blowing the cooker, it will burn you (Is this English?)
I feel like I already said no water gun in the house
Are you obeying? Because if you are not I will chapa. The moment I mention chapa there is obedience that is followed by, ‘if you chapa me, I will tell Ms. Evelyne to put you in naughty corner’
Shower time screams
“Mugi lets go shower, it’s shower time” every day response, “No I don’t want to shower, mama you go shower I will just sit here and wait for you.” And when we eventually get to his room to remove his clothes and get into the shower the decibels go higher.
Stop playing with the soap, you will slide and fall
No you cannot shower with that toy it uses batteries and so it’s shouldn’t get in water, it will get spoilt.
That toy can’t hold water, choose another toy
Stop eating your face towel
Stop drinking that water
You will get soap in your eyes, see I told you, stop touching your eyes, let me rinse off the soap.
Stop splashing water on mama
And then 15 minutes later, I go get a towel and make my announcement before I enter the bathroom.
We are done; lets go wear clothes and sleep “no we are not done, close the drain mama, don’t switch off the water.” I always trick him with medicine to get him out of the shower.
Lets go wear clothes then I will give you dawa (always works) dawa here being scotts.
Yes I am those mums who let the house help feed their baby dinner, not because I can’t but I am not ready for the fight and somehow my help has learnt how to feed him in a record 20 minutes. I don’t have the patience anymore to plead with him to eat especially because I know in school he feeds so well, by himself. So before she leaves at 5:45, Mugi has had his dinner and we can just play.
He has somehow come to understand the word ‘agreement’ and every time we set a rule, I remind him, so we have an agreement? Yes, is his ever so charming answer not knowing it has bound him ‘insert evil laugh from me’. You finish your food first then you can play outside, we have an agreement? “Yes”
Then there is the sweet adorable charming side that always shows up when you are at your end. When you have just finished a 12-decibel order and he comes right over and hugs you and says ‘I love you Mama’. You sit down at 8:00pm to think about how you can finally just breath normal, speak normal and you realise that you love that boy, so much, how he gets his blankie, puts his finger in his mouth and comes to cuddle with you as he is watching Ben and Holly for the 1 hour 20 minutes that he is allowed to watch before bed time. You miss how he gets excited at a new concepts when you are in the kitchen cooking, he comes over to recite exactly what they said, gives the cheesiest laugh, does a dance that involves him lying down on the floor and kicking in circles.
Yes I miss the time he goes out and plucks a flower, brings it to me and says, ‘mama I got a flower for you’ why? I often ask ‘because I love you sooooooo much’. I know the caretaker is always telling him not to pluck flowers but he defiantly does just to deliver one to me.
Then the post bedtime guilt that almost every mother has when their baby goes to sleep shows up, I wish I did not have to scream, oh! Why was I so tired to listen to him? I should have rolled on the carpet longer than 2 minutes, why did I answer my phone when he was trying to tell me about Ben and Holly, when he was playing with the soap he was just creating his own fun.
So I have decided not too take life to seriously when it comes to parenting this boy, when it rains, we go out and jump in the water ‘muddy paddles’ he calls them though there is hardly any mud. I fill the bath tub with water and tell him that he is going swimming and just let him enjoy his bath time, I give a sticker for a good deed and sometimes just because I love him (you will be surprised how much they love stickers, grab some from text book center or house of leather and make memories). I will blow bubbles with him because that is what he enjoys. We play catch the ball just to pass time as we wait for 6pm when he is allowed to watch TV.
Every morning when he comes to my room and says ‘mama wakey wakey it’s morning, look Mr. Sun is al ready out,’ I know he has a new slate, he has forgotten and forgiven me for where I fell short as a mother and I know I have been given a new chance to be a better mum. I say I love you and he will sometimes say I love you or thank you and my heart swells with joy, because I know a have another chance to screw up a little less than I did yesterday.
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