The C word




It’s taken me a while to write about contraceptive, yeap! The C word. I was partly not sure what to say about it because the opinions on it are as varied as all the friends you have. Everyone has an opinion about it and if you happen to go to church you know the Bible says nothing about it, which makes it even more of an open-ended discussion. You almost feel like God was saying ‘tumia akili’ (use your brain) when it comes to contraceptives.

It becomes even more confusing when you go the gynaecologist and get a whole list of possible contraceptives that you could use. To make matters worse there is no right or wrong contraceptive and every experience is different for every woman. You almost feel like they should create one product like ‘panadol’ you are assured it will work for 90% of the population with 0 side effects. Or Vaseline. You get my point I am sure.

So in the freedom of tumia akili, here goes my opinion

Just because contraceptives aren’t in the Bible does not mean that they are forbidden. I don’t think vaccination is in the Bible either or going to see a doctor, in fact it says that when you are sick you lay hands on one another. So to defend your non-use of contraceptive as not in the Bible is really an excuse to use the Bible to back your opinion. The closest any passage in the Bible comes to talking about contraceptive is the one that a brother was doing the ‘coitus interruptus’ (withdrawal method) so that his sister in-law could not get pregnant and God cursed Him. No it doesn’t mean the withdrawal method is cursed, the intention behind what he was doing made him be cursed. (Gen 38:6-10)

The same way God has given men wisdom to do certain things, so has He given man the wisdom to come up with contraceptives. It doesn’t mean that contraceptives supersede the almightiness of God, no, it just means that man in his own wisdom is able to control his life and decisions (free will). No wonder almost all the contraceptives are never 100%. The only sure way of not getting pregnant is by not having sex.

Did you know that even tubal ligation is not 100% assurance of not getting pregnant?

I know children come from God but as my husband says ‘it is very unfair of you not be on contraceptives only to give birth to so many children that you cannot take care of.’ God instructed us to go forth and fill the earth He did not by any chance give all that responsibility to one woman. Hence the contraceptives, he gave us wisdom for that and to be honest sometimes He does honour our effort and sometime he will challenge us beyond what we think we can handle. My pastor once said ‘God has given us a brain so we can give Him a break’.

I know women who are allergic to copper and so the coil is a no no. Others are allergic to latex and so condoms are not an option. We have an array of options the patch, pills, no-plant and if all else fails the good old coitus interruptus or counting days. Do know you you can just download a simple calendar to help you count days of when you are most likely to get pregnant and ‘safe days’ as well. Get on some contraceptive, children come from God but we pay the bills.

I know countless women who have gotten pregnant while on contraceptives; I know others who have been trying to get pregnant; and even others who have opted for adoption because they couldn’t get pregnant. So yes children do come from God. Let it not be said that because children come from God I should not be on any contraceptives. Or because my friend has been waiting on God for so long for a child then I will not be on contraceptives. God has mapped each of our journey and in His own time and space will make things happen for our friends.

Be wise,

Happy Parenting


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